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My shortest relationship was a month.
I've had a few short-term boyfriends.
I've been given flowers.
I've been given chocolates.
I've been given shoes/clothes.
I've been given jewelry.
I've been kissed in the rain.
I've been kissed under the stars.
I've been kissed on a roller coaster.
I've been kissed in a pool.
I've been kissed underwater.
I've been kissed while I was driving.
I've been kissed while I was asleep.
I've been kissed in a bus.
I've been kissed while laying in the grass.
I've been on a date.
I've been on a group date.
I've taken a nap with a guy.
I've made out in a closet.
I've made out with just a friend.
I've made out with a member of the same sex.
I've played some sort of kissing game.
I've been asked out in person.
I've been asked out online.
I've been asked out over the phone.
I've been asked out on Valentine's Day.
A guy has cooked for me.
A guy has written me a poem.
A guy has sang for me.
A guy has played guitar for me.
I've cuddled with a guy whom I wasn't dating.
I've been kissed on the lips.
I've been kissed on the neck.
I've been kissed on the stomach.
I've been kissed on the nose.
I've been kissed on the top of the head.
I've been kissed on the hand.
I've been kissed on the feet.
I've received a hickey.
I've given a hickey.
I've been in love.
I've been in lust.
I've confessed to a crush.
A crush has confessed to me.
I've been in a love triangle.
I've been on a date to the movies.
I've been on a date to a restaurant.
I've been on a date to an arcade.
I've had a crush on a member of the same sex before and I'm straight.
I've been felt up in public.
I've had feelings for somebody else when I was already taken.
I've had feelings for a friend's boyfriend.
A friend has dated my ex.
I've dated a friend's ex.
I'm still friends with an ex.
A guy has talked dirty to me before.
I have a boyfriend right now.
I celebrate anniversaries.
I've never been given a promise ring.
A guy has promised me forever.
If I have a boyfriend, I give him nicknames.
I've fallen for my best friend.
A guy has given me a foot massage.
A guy has rubbed my shoulders.
I like holding hands in public.
A guy has tried to take me away from my boyfriend.
A guy has fed me. Literally.
I've cooked/baked for a guy.
I've stayed up late talking to a guy I had feelings for.
I haven't had a sleepover with the opposite sex.
I've led a guy on.
I've knowingly teased a guy.
I've been in the same class as a boyfriend.

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I did the things in RED. :)
I've never been in a long distance relationship.

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For now, I'll be updating my Tumblr instead.

hatethat-iloveyou.tumblr.com

:)

You know what? I think I might be changing to Livejournal back.
I knowwwww. So damn gatal right..

But yeah. Livejournal is much more 'exclusive'? I don't know. The feeling is not the same lah writing at blogspot. I know crazyyyyyyy right.

Whatever. I shall post my new URL soon. If I want to. :)

Surprise!

Dear diary,

Yesterday was one of the sweetest moment i had with my love. I was surprised by two surprises! What's more, there was no occasion at all! Happy happy girl, me!

He tricked me that we are going to have dinner at Pariss International at Marina Square. The place that i brought him when he came back from his Taiwan trip. I thought to myself, 'Yaayy! Seafooood!'. We both love seafood. Upon reaching, as it wasn't the time yet to have dinner, we went around, looking for his jeans and tops. After his mini shopping, he asked am I ready to eat. I said yes! Was on the way walking to the place, he actually turned to the opposite way. I'm like, but the place is that way! He said nah.. We're going back to where we parked the bike. And i was like huh?? While going down the escalator, I was kinda disappointed. Was looking forward to some seafood. On the way to our bike, we walked passed the entry to Pan Pacific Hotel. And he said 'Let's eat here' and i was like huuuuuuhhhhh?? Macam2 alasan die kasi. Nak g toilet lah, nak beli prata lah.. And to my big surprise, he actually brought me to Global Kitchen!!!! The place that I wanted to bring him. AWWW SOO SWEET RIGHTTT!!! Ikotkan hati, I wanted to screaaam! Hahaha. That was not it.

Halfway eating, he said be right back. He wanted to go to the toilet. Lambat jugak die pergi. He came back, out of breathe! He was panting like as if he ran all the way back. Then he started commenting about my colourful bracelet. How mismatched it is with my dressing. And suddenlyyy, he took out a Guess box and inside was a Guess bracelet!!!!! Omg. My baby damn sweet lah! I was of course, surprised!!!!! Hehe happy me! Actually the toilet trip was a trip to his bike cos he put my surprise gift there. Hahah.

Thank you my baby for making me very happy yesterday. Appreciate everything that you've done. You make me fall inlove with you all over again. Two surprises in a day! Susah datang tau.. I know you love me with all your heart and soul. Me too love. Never love someone this much and this deep before. And surprising me when there's no occasion at all. Super sweet. 10 points for you love!!

I'm so lucky to have you. There's no one like you Md Faizrul. No one.

I fucking love you, my sweetest love!

Don't drag my boyfriend to parties just because you don't have any company to go with.
Don't you have your own group of friends before he and his friends came into the picture?

I have issues. Major issues. And it's badly affecting my relationship with him.
I don't know what I want in life and in this relationship. I might be feeling all loved one minute and angsty the next. I AM SUCH AN ANGSTY GIRL.

I don't wanna drive him away with my constant need to argue. I've tried to stop but it's impossible! I can't calm myself down. I need help. What the fuck is actually bothering me?? I love him so much but at the same time, I feel like letting him go because I can't stand seeing him angry at me all the time, everyday. I'm losing hope.............. :'(

But I know things will get better eventually. It always does.

We fight like there's no tomorrow but in the end,
we still holds hands despite every single flaws.

Reading all those newly couples comments to each other makes me miss those early times when both of us just got to know each other.

Oh how I miss feeling all sugar rushy and mentalish every single time I talk,meet or think of him. When love is still fresh, everything seems sooo wonderful is'nt it? It's the honeymoon period they call it. But definitely it won't be happily ever after 24/7. And when those flaws and imperfections starts to rear it's heads up, those are the crucial times. Because that's when the real test begins. So enjoy while you can newly couples! ;)

Now what about us? The 3.5 years couple. We are definitely over the honeymoon period. PERIOD. Haha. Fights every now and then. Well that's absolutely normal. I mean c'mon. Who the fuck don't quarell? But it's not about the quarells. It's about the aftermath of quarelling. Sometimes even small arguements can break a relationship. What more the big ones? It's just how we handle it. And of course, without a doubt, I've lost the battle quite a few times. But he was the one who pulls me back up. If he doesn't do that, most probably we're over a long time ago. Sometimes the mood swings makes me feel extra sensitive and extra moody. I can make a big fuss out of nothing. Really. Even a small arguement between us can make me give up all this. Who's with me? Those are the times that I just hope that he understands and tolerates my never ending squabbles. I know he gets frustrated sometimes but THAT'S JUST HOW GIRLS ARE. Thank God he has been really patient with me till today.

I still feel excited though whenever we're going on a date. I don't really mind where we go as long as we are together. I just hope our love is strong enough to go through everything that we are about to go through in the future.

Amin.


*Anything that worth having, is sure enough worth fighting for.

Marriage

Let's talk about serious thing here. My dad has been asking me this question which I myself can't answer him. The bonus question..

' When are you getting married? '.

I would LOVE to get married,Dad and Mum. I would LOVE to start making a family on my own. Furthermore almost everyone,cousins,blood ties my age is settling down already!! That definitely has put some pressure in me. I know i'm not getting any younger. As much as I would want to live in denial,i will still be turning 23 in 9 more months. OMG. 2-3 people. TWO FUCKING 3. Stop the time please!!!!! Fuck. It's the perfect age to start planning to settle down already. I know. Sigh.

And not to say anything bad but this one of the disadvantage of having a bf who is almost the same age and to make it worst, guys at this age still wants to have fun. Actually that depends on the guy itself. Some girls are lucky enough to get a guy who wants to settle down quickly and willing to let go of their crazy lifestyle. I just got to know this guy who is full of tatoos and definitely those wild kinds just got hitched last week. So it all depends on what kinda guy he is. Well, i'm stuck with someone who still wants to enjoy. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh

I really do wish that he will finally make up his mind to start planning on getting married for REAL. He does talk about getting married but i dont put my hopes in it cos when i asked him lets get engaged then. He'll be like errr arrr. But i still wanna enjoy. Then why the fuck do you talk about marriage with me??!! Doesnt make sense right? Bebual pasal kahwin. Jom ar kahwin cepat2. Tapi biler ajak tunang, READ: TUNANG, cakap masih nak enjoy. What the fuck?

Siak ah. Will we ever get married??

Dash Berlin was freaking awesome yesterday! I had a very good time inside except for some moments outside the club because of some attention seekers. My first impression? Totally not good. I super hate touchy girls. I don't get how girls can be so touchy with guys. Especially with guys they just met. It shows what kinda person you are. And bf, don't try to back them up. If they are touchy with all the guys they met, they probably behave the same when they're with you. AND, DON'T JUDGE MY FRIENDS IF YOUR FRIENDS ARE MUCH WORSE YEAH. So don't bother telling me how good or nice they are since my mind has already figure out what kinda girls they are.

When girls hate other girls, things won't be sweet and everything nice. :) And you should know how girls behave when they don't like that particular person.

Other then that,everything was good. The best was especially the times spent with him. We kept saying we should do that one day, and finally after a year or two, we finally did it. And it was great! Should do that again next time.

Argh.. Boring weekdays starts tomorrow. HOW BORING.

How's your New Year so far people?

Mine was great with a lil hiccups on Saturday. I don't know. Maybe it's just a curse. Me and him never fails to quarell when we go clubbing together. ALWAYS OK. I mean c'mon. Who the fuck go clubbing and just stay at one place with arms crossing? Tell me about it. Tsk. And when I asked to move closer, he just stays there. Might as well I just go with my friends if you plan to just stand and watch.

Anyway went out with my family on Sunday to Sakura Tampines to celebrate Grandma's birthday. And we went to hunt for her gifts after that. Bugis was the place. My uncles and mum shared money to buy her a Bonia bag while me and brother split the cost for her A/X watch. Fuh canggih or what eh nenek pakai Armani Exchange watch. And I can see some changes in my brother. He literally washed a whole lot of dishes last Saturday WITHOUT anyone telling. AND THAT'S A BIG DEAL LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. That's a first. And I can see that he's the kind who is not selfish with money. You know lah, NS pay. Peanuts right? But he insisted to buy a branded watch for my nenek. He said 'kalau murah tapi tak berkenan buat ape?'. Actually he wanted to buy on his own but mum told me to share. She gave me a choice to share with my uncles and her or with my bro. I choose the latter. Look at how generous he is! I bet he will pampers his gf (if he has one) with stuff even though he doesnt earn much. Lucky girl. I honestly can say that he makes a good bf. He is damn chill. And rarely gets angry.

And for Friday, we went to Clarke Quay and met friends there. Overall it was fun.

I really do hope that 2011 will be a better year for us both. I'm learning to control my temper but I hope he will do his part to not hurt me too. Cos it takes 2 hands to clap. And I can't wait to begin my car praticals. Insyallah. My dad has already plan to buy Canon Eos 60D. It's Canon best DSLR in the market right now. But I read Nikon D7000 is better. Both of these camera is the best in the market. Oh well. Okla tu janji ade camera sudah.

Shall end this entry with a photo of us!

The Love of my life.